So I’ve penned [read "typed"] my own thoughts on long scrums

to the tune of “Playa Hata” by Notorious BIG.

Please note this in no way has anything to do with the current scrums I attend

Good evening And for my last hitI’d like to take you back to the classica-hem, AGILE style of course Uhh

Scrum Masterrrrr, turn your head round

This topic’s been beat to the ground

Let’s move on…..

Wake up….

Open the door

No one else needs to talk anymore…

Let’s go back to our work now……

You know we need to do our work.

And you….and you….should let us go back to that.

Let’s go off individually….on a working spree…

We’ll produce results for you and me…..

Scrum Masterrrrr, turn your head round

This topic’s been beat to the ground

Let’s move on…..

Wake up….

Open the door

No one else needs to talk anymore…

Let’s go back to our work now……

You see, there are two kind of scrum masters in the world today

We have, the Scrum Masta’, and we have, the Scrum Pro-longer

Please don’t hate me because I enjoy a short scrum bay-bay.

Problem:  Staf doesn’t start unless someone logs into the computer or STAFProc window is closed accidentally.

Ok at least that’s what they say

(Machine names have been “blurred” to protect the innocent)

Well don’t fret there’s a very easy solution to get STAF to start up; and get rid of that pesky window.

You can read the details found here

If you don’t feel like editing registries, and searching how to create a service try the following solution.

  Add Staf Proc as a scheduled windows task.

Start -> Control Panel -> Scheduled Tasks -> Add Scheduled Task

Then select your Staf version

Set the task to run “when the computer starts”

Click Next. ( Yes password remains blank – D’oh make sure you have Admin rights when doing this..)

Now the last step is to delete that pesky Start up process..

And that’s it.  Now when you restart your computer go ahead and give STAF < target machine > ping ping   a try.

Goosh is a pseudo command line shell for retreiving search results from google.

I suggest you stop what you’re doing now.

Open up a browser and goto goosh.org

Next type ‘h’

Have fun.  My searches will never be the same….

When starting RPT (Rational Performance Tester) and receiving a

“JVM terminated exit code = 1″

Don’t panic as this tech note explains its most likely a question of clearing your cache.

1. Start -> Run->cmd
2. Go to to the directory containing the java.exe that the product is configured to use, if you’re unsure where this is try re-opening RPT and look at the error that specifies the java location.
   RPT_INSTALLATION_DIRECTORY/jdk/bin
3. Type the following command:
   javaw.exe -Xshareclasses:destroy

Next just re-open RPT and you should be good.

It’s time like these when I realize how much dependence I have on good software.

From Firefox I listen to music inner browser, manage Lotus Activities, surf, work, and cook dinner….I’m wondering has anyone else had these problems?

Apparently I’m not the only suffering from performance head aches today…

A big hat tip to Ryan Green for positing  on “Performance of Ajax Applications on Mobile Devices,” by Mikko Pervlla.  Just as Ryan describes this thesis is definitely worth reading.  Its detailed, and interesting and covers a basic overview of AJAX’s short history to current Libraries, Toolkits, and Frameworks.

While the main focus of this thesis is on Ajax &  Mobile Devices, its a great read for those interested in getting familiar with what some of the technologies are that encompass the ever growing title of “AJAX”.

It’s funny to read the responses to the review on SnagIT by those unfamiliar with it.  SnagIT is the type of software that once you
use it – your hooked.  It’s well made, multi-functional, and if you work in QA quite near impossible
to go without.  Yes..yes, I know, they have several other screen capturing tools out there.  But SnagIT combines functionality and
flexibility with ease of use.  The editor alone is so useful that often times I would open up a picture that wasn’t even
“snagged” but needed modifications or to combine pictures for presentation, document, or most commonly defect submission.

A while back I saw that Mercury had released a screen capture/movie recorder that would allow you to upload directly to Quality Center
in one go – similar to Fogbugz – screen capture.  Even though the idea of a “one stop shop” to click – upload and label the defect in one motion is a nice idea, I always preferred loading up SnagIT.

Why?

Well simply because you mark up the image, highlights and shadow certain areas, and add fancy [read: feeency] useful text.

So what’s my affiliation with SnagIT?  – None, even worse my current employer doesn’t have a site license for SnagIT.

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Brain fog clearing is my ad hoc-process by which I check the news, scan the blogs I like to read, or call my wife, for a few minutes while the fog inside my head clears allowing me to refocus on the task at hand. The problem with brain fog clearing is that if one is not careful, you can indeed let the A.D.D. train wisk you away into a random task that doesn’t need to be done that second.

Now some might prefer cube hopping. You know the types, floating from cubes to group of cubes discussing the random topics. Personally I don’t mind the cube hoppers, the only thing I do mind about the cube hoppers are the ‘selective hops’. These are the cube hoppers who stroll into a group of cubes aimlessly, desperate for conversation. They stand in the vision of the person working away tapping the top of the cube or maybe they give a slight gutteral cough and nice slurp on there coffee.

Cube Hopper: “So….what’s doing….”
Me: “…(look up from monitor).. not much “

Cube Hopper: “…..(coffee slurp)…..(lip smack)….”
Me: (still staring at Cube Hopper)

Cube Hopper: “……..(coffee slurp…longer this time)…..yeah.. (throat clear)”
Me: (still staring)

Cube Hopper: “so…..seen Danny here today?”
Me: (glancing over at Danny’s desk……note to self – computer, and computer bag gone, chair tucked in, ‘while you were out’ messages pinned on Danny’s board)

Me: ” uh…nope haven’t seen him”
Cube Hopper: “…alright…”

Almost on queue from the corner of your eye you see that one slow hand motion. Like when you were a kid playing rock, paper, scissors. You remember that game right? Remember how it always seemed as if the other kid’s hand came down in a slow, hammer like motion. Here it was…the Cube Hopper, right hand stretched out, leaning across the top of the corner walls of my cube. His left hand holding a mug of half drinken, dark, black, stained mug of coffee, the right hand resting comfortably in the “paper” position. It’s at that moment following the “..alright” when the “paper” motion seems to slowly transform into a “rock” hand in the good old tradition of “1….2….3…paper, rock, scissors”.

You stare up at the Cube Hopper, and he back at you, you raise to grab a piece of your plastic cube wall in the hopes of supporting it against the on coming blow.

Then Cube Hopper’s eyes become small, focused..and takes his left hand and pounds the corner of the cube in a rythmic 1 – 2 bounce, followed by “hand gun and wink motion”.  Cube Hopper manages to shake every part of my desk, pinned notes, papers, diagrams, and pictures before doing the slow truffle shuffle for the door.

Three seconds later and its just me, the notebook, and zpro server under my desk competing for who can make the louder buzz.

After digging in my Facebook inbox, and checking notifications – I still could not find where these “so called” messages went. Finally I went back to my gmail message from facebook notifying me of all these “new messages”, and noticed it was sent by “Top Friends” another one of these widget applications that everyone loads on to there facebook pages magically transforming you from the orderly layout that was Facebook of yore’ to the Kentwood, Louisiania world of myspace trailerpark-ness.

Yes, I’m feeling e-snoby but for good reason. These facebook applications are annoying, if I’m not using them or better yet if there not installed on my facebook profile, then Facebook should not allow the widget to send message notification as if I was already subscribed to the service.

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